Who will help me?

Thoughts on Psalm 121  (KJV)

I painted this after a time of prayer when
 a friend said she could see me as a little
girl gazing up  in wonder  at the sky at night. 

1 I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help.

2 My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth.

3 He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber.

4 Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep.

5 The Lord is thy keeper: the Lord is thy shade upon thy right hand.

6 The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moon by night.

7 The Lord shall preserve thee from all evil: he shall preserve thy soul.

8 The Lord shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore.

It is so easy to lose sight of the Lord when hard times come upon us. It is almost natural for us to turn to someone or something that we can see, smell, touch or hear. I find I often seek the Lord as a last resort, when my own resources have run out. It then becomes a prayer of desperation, rather than an attitude of trust. 

How different my life would be if I could learn to do what we read in this Psalm. It speaks to me of total trust in a Father in heaven who is looking out for us. It speaks of a child-like trust, like that of a child looking up in wonder at the stars in the sky at night. This Psalm speaks to me of security and hope that God is in control of all that happens. 

Verse 7 speaks of God preserving our souls. It is not just what happens here on earth, but what happens for all eternity that is at the heart of how God deals with us. It is also not just about Him preserving our souls but also the souls of all that look to Him. Looking into the sky at night reminds me to keep a divine perspective on things that happen to me, to trust as a child trust a good parent. 

"Father God I ask that you help me turn to you, to your infinite grace and compassion, not just in times of need, but daily, and minute by minute. I want to learn to lean totally on your help. "

Gratitude

I have had a busy week this week and have been worn out. I am tired emotionally and physically. But I got a real lift this evening as I dragged my way around the supermarket to get something for my evening meal. Before God set me free from food addiction I would have been craving certain food types and would have gone straight for the chocolate or ice cream or cakes etc.

 Today as I walked around I realised I was indeed craving something...a mozzarella and bacon salad. I did buy some of those ice creams on a stick covered in chocolate but didn't fancy one when I got home. I was yearning a large salad. Amazing. So amazing. I am FREE!!! I feel so grateful to God that I am no longer addicted to food. I am free! The way my life has turned around is incredible and I give Him thanks and praise indeed.

I watched a TV programme a while back called 'Weight loss ward' on ITV 1. It followed various patients from Sunderland who are being treated for obesity and food addiction. It really made me grateful as well for my freedom. I knew not long before I was set free that I was on my way to that kind of morbid obesity and an early death. I praise God indeed for His work in my life. If it wasn't for Him I would have gone on getting bigger and bigger and bigger.

My freedom came when I surrendered every thing to God. When I allowed Him to be the comfort to me that food had been previously. It took years to trust Him enough, to look to Him and say 'You are my everything' and to mean that with all my heart. But it was doing this that set me on the road to freedom. I walked towards the light of Christ. I just looked to Him and no-one else. I got to a point where I said "Lord, I just want to know you. If I am fat and a food addict for the rest of my life I don't care. I just want to know more of You." And I  meant it. That is what finally started me walking to the light instead of just talking about the light.

Look to Him, walk to the light and believe that He will bring freedom. Jesus died to enable you to be set free.

"The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it"  1 Thessalonians 5:24  (NIVUK)